Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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