umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
