I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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