I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
