Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
