we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
