I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
