He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
try to milk me bitch
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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