I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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