angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
