BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
