Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Randomize
