Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
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