On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Randomize
