So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
