Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Randomize
