If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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