did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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