She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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