OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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