Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize