you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
