We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
