I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
