i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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