sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
