my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
