Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
