I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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