I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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