wat bout pragnant strippers??
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
