I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
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