it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
