Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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