4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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