id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
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