I think scott just propositioned me for sex
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
