I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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