: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
