apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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