called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
