she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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