All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Omg I joined a choir last night...
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
