So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
