I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
