how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
