If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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