Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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