youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I AM VODKA MAN
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
