Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
You made out with two different species that night
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
